Pride month is officially over, and since I didn’t get to go to any of the Pride Parades this year, I’ve decided to celebrate by myself making the list of what I like about being gay. I know many people think it’s bad because of homophobia, no legal rights, ignorant people and many other factors but the thing is, I really love being gay. Here’s why.
1. The community
I know I’ve bitched about the community in a previous article, and I really believe that there is some crazy stuff going on sometimes, but whenever I’m at a gay bar or gay event of some sort, I can’t help but feeling part of something special. My sexuality is hardly the most important thing about myself, and yet the fact that I’m part of a minority makes me feel close to the gay people I meet, it’s like we are sharing something important. Besides the actual community in my town there’s also the internet community, which I find extremely welcoming and interesting -yes, there are some crazy people out there, but I’m glad to see that they are a minority-. All in all I have to say that in my opinion the gay community is one of the most accepting and supportive I’ve seen, probably because if you’ve had to deal with rejection and fear before, you are less likely to behave the same way with other people.
2. Thinking outside the box
If there’s a question I hate (alright there’s more than one, but just go with it, ok?) is: “So who’s the man/woman in your relationship?”. I’m sure any gay person out there has heard it before, and yet somehow people won’t stop asking it. The thing is, the whole point of being in a homosexual relationship is having two of the same gender, or it wouldn’t be called a homosexual relationship! I don’t think it’s an overly complex thought to process, but maybe I’m wrong. Anyway, one of the things I like the most about being gay, is that you can be anything you want in your relationship. Some people may argue that there are still roles in a relationship (I’m looking at you, SnobbishBlond) and I guess I agree, but the difference is that they can be whatever you like them to be.
The same goes for you as an individual. Of course, straight people are as free as anybody else to try different things and mix and match the best of the two genders, but I think that gay people are less afraid to do so. Everyone has a feminine side and a masculine side and I definitely like to explore them both.
3. Coming out
This is an emotional and sometimes traumatic experience, but when everything goes right, there’s nothing more liberating than coming out of the closet. It’s a moment when you get to see what people are actually worthy of your love, who’s a real friend and who is on your side no matter what. It can surprise you and it can make you really happy. It is one of the weirdest and best feelings in the world: it feels like being naked and vulnerable but, at the same time, strong, powerful and honest. I don’t know, maybe I’m just crazy.
Also, sometimes people have such funny reactions, it’s worth it just to see that.
I’ve only been to one Pride in my life, and I wasn’t even out of the closet yet, but I can definitely say it’s something that I love. First of all, let’s face it, no one has more fun than the gay community. On a more serious note I can tell from personal experience that to anybody who is just figuring out their sexuality, it can be an amazing experience that can make you realize that you’re not alone in the world and that there are thousands of people out there who feel exactly how you feel.
Now, I’m pretty sure that there are plenty of shy gay people, but I have to say that being gay has made me really secure of myself. My personality is obviously a combination of many different things, many of which aren’t gay-related, but I do know that while trying to figure out my sexuality I spent a lot of time thinking about myself and who I was. That way I’ve learnt to know myself better and also to love my personality as a whole, which has made me stronger that I used to be.
Moreover, even though I’ve never really had to deal with homophobia in my life, there are so many stupid people around us, and I know that the best we can do is being prepared to face them. This doesn’t mean being defensive or anything, it just means that it’s good knowing who you are and not being afraid to show it, even if people act awkward because of it.
Do I really need to add anything else?
7. Double wardrobe
It’s true that every person has got their own personal style, that not everybody shares the same size, and that just because you are in a relationship it doesn’t mean that you automatically own everything your partner owns, but if you are dating someone of your same gender, chances are you are going to see your wardrobe doubled. And, if you are lucky, you might also get many new pairs of shoes.
It may seem shallow, but I personally believe it’s a great perk of being gay. Maybe that’s why they say that people who have been dating for a while start to look alike…
8. Movies and TV shows
There isn’t much that’s more satisfying than watching a random movie or TV show and finding a gay character in there. There isn’t much that’s more stupid than continuing watching only to see what happens to that gay character even though the rest of the movie/show sucks. As SnobbishBlond has said in one of her previous articles we are past that time where there were two gay characters on TV who did nothing but being gay, but I guess I’m still used to it because whenever I find a show where someone is gay, I can’t help but watch it, even if it’s really bad. Movies are the same. I can’t tell you how many really bad movies I’ve sat through just because they were “gay movies”. The thing is, it’s really fun to see gay people on the screen, to see your story told a million times, in many different ways even if sometimes they are really cheesy and poorly written. And the huge gay fanbases of many TV shows seem to agree with me.
I have saved the best for last. Even if I didn’t like all the things I’ve said up to now about being gay, even if I hated who I was and wanted to change it, even so, I think I would still say that sex is an advantage. I’m not saying that lesbian sex is better than straight sex (I wouldn’t know…), but I sure know that I love it. First of all, I really believe that there isn’t anybody who can touch you better than someone who has your same body. It’s as simple as that, if you know your own body, then you are going to know what to do to someone who is just like you. Secondly, you get to have sex with women. Ok ok, that’s just a perk if you are into it, but what can I say, I really love women.
10. Sex II
While straight people spend tons of money on contraceptives, when you are gay you can have sex as much as you like completely free and without the risk of getting pregnant. Well, maybe if you are really really good you might get pregnant anyway, but that’s probably not going to happen…
Let me know what you like about being gay (or whatever your sexual orientation is!) in the comments! Happy Pride everybody!