A couple of days ago I opened one of my favorite YouTube channels (Arielle Scarcella’s channel, that is) and found a very interesting video, called What lesbians think about bisexuals. Here Arielle asks a group of gay women a bunch of questions about bisexuals and bisexuality. Even though the majority of them says many things that could be perceived as hurtful and unfair I’ve interpreted the video as a way to challenge their beliefs and make them realize that their opinion is just driven by stereotypes and bad past experiences. After the interviews she makes some really good points about how lesbians are often judgmental and discriminating towards bisexuals and the message that comes across is that you shouldn’t rule out bi women just because they also happen to like men. All in all a good video.
Of course the video didn’t go unnoticed and it caused quite a stir all over the internet: angry bisexuals feeling persecuted on one side, angry lesbians arguing that bisexuals are cold-blooded sluts who are too greedy to make up their minds on the other. Now, I really don’t see what all the fuss is about: even though I understand why some bisexuals were hurt by this video, its whole point was to have lesbians think about how crazy their preconceptions are, so it was actually on their side. About the lesbian response to the video…well, saying that I was ashamed isn’t enough. I am so appalled by these women who have nothing better to do than trash bisexuals.
Let’s look at this objectively, shall we? There are tons of women out there who say that they would never in a million years date a bisexual, because they are allegedly incapable of a serious commitment and that at the end of the day they are just going to leave them for a guy. I want all of you to take a moment and grasp how absurd and flimsy these arguments are. Most of all, I want to point out that it always sucks when someone breaks up with you and, honestly, I don’t give a damn if they are leaving me for a man, a woman, a monkey or a unicorn.
I have said in a previous article that I don’t really like to engage with my lesbian community because at times they might be a little too intense and take themselves a little too seriously. Well, this is exactly what I’m talking about. There is so much hate towards bisexuals going around, when people should just be able to date whomever they want and identify as whatever it is that they feel they are.
The thing is, I know what it is that triggers all this hate and aggressiveness. It’s insecurity. Women who don’t want to date bisexuals have often been hurt by a bisexual in the past and, in my opinion, they feel like they would be in competition with man and can’t handle that. The truth is that it’s not a competition. A lesbian has the potential to break your heart just as much as a bisexual does. To quote one of my favorite movie lines ever: grow up. And get over yourself.