A couple of years ago, a cousin of mine said: “I have a lot of gay friends. You know, they are very nice once they’ve accepted you in their circle, they take you to parties and they are so sensitive. But family? Well, that’s out of discussion. I mean, how could they think they’d be able to raise a baby?
I couldn’t answer her because she was cleaning my teeth (she’s a dentist, so duh), but even if my mouth hadn’t been opened by her weird tool-thing, I don’t think I would have said anything (if you didn’t already know it, I’m not out to my entire family).
Anyway, today’s story is not about me, but about my judgy cousin.
She was so obsessed with having children that she decided to leave our hometown to live with a general she’d met on a train three months before.
They decided to get married without knowing anything about each other, but she wanted a quick-husband because her biological clock was running out of time and he wanted a quick-wife because he is out on missions more or less eight months per year, so imagine how difficult it is to find one.
They’d been married for two months when she got pregnant and, in December, her daughter was born.
Now, after two years of marriage, she is back in our hometown, with no husband, no job, no house, but with her so coveted daughter.
She’ll raise her child alone because the father will be on missions and, if not, he’ll be 800 km away. Is this wrong? Was marrying a man that she didn’t love wrong? Is trying to have a child, trying in every way in a country where you need a man (or a woman) to be mother or father, wrong?
No, it’s not.
She did right, she did her best, she did the only thing she could do. And I’m not judging her -for that-.
I’m judging for what she said about gay people, but maybe now that she is a single mother with an ex-husband she’s never loved, she’ll change her mind.